Then was funny than now!

Spent a little time perusingthe web for funny commentaries and how they have changed as the times have.Please feel free to share any you may have. I know, or have heard of is probably more acurate, tons more, so let's see what you've got!

then: "Battleship mouth and a rowboat ass."
now: Big talker, small doer.

then: Busier than a one legged cat tryin' to bury @!$%# on a marble floor.
now: a very busy person

then: Busier than a one legged cat tryin' to bury @!$%# on a marble floor.
now: a very busy person

then: Stick a broom up my ass, and I'll sweep the floor while I'm at it.
now: Don't give me anything else to do, I am already too busy.

then: Sounds like a manure salesman with a mouthful of samples.
now: Someone who is full of it, can't be believed.

then: I'd walk through hell in gasoline underwear for you.
now: I love you.

then: Shakin like a dog @!$%#tin a peach pit
now: Trembling with fear

then: Looks like S/He chased a fart through a barrel of nails!
now: S/He is pretty darn ugly.

then: His head whistles in a cross wind.
now: He has no brains at all!

then: If you taped his mouth shut, he'd fart himself to death.
now: He is long winded